I
often have dreams in which I think and behave in ways that are
completely uncharacteristic to who I am when I am awake. Sometimes I
dream that I am a person that in real life I would gag at the very
thought of being, like a cop, or a politician (I have dreamed of
being both of these). And what's even more peculiar is that in these
dreams I am completely immersed in the character; I generally do not
realize at all that I am not who I would normally be (in some other
«waking» world). Last night I had one of those dreams, but the
uncharacteristic thinking and behavior was very subtle this time, and
all the more interesting.
In
the dream I was tinkering with my motorcycle in the side parking lot
of a well lit service station at night (in real life I have never
owned or even driven a motorcycle, though I dream of them often and
have no real-life qualms about owning one). I noticed two young women
nearby and asked them for some information. They seemed friendly and
willing to help. Then I realized that I needed something to protect
my eyes (i.e. safety glasses --- a very characteristic concern in
this case) as I worked on the bike. So, I asked one of the nearby
women if she had a pair of old glasses or safety goggles that I could
borrow. She said she didn't, but they might sell them inside the
service station. I agreed with her and entered the station to look.
That
was when I did the first subtly uncharacteristic thing. I left my
motorcycle unattended in the parking lot with the keys still in it,
all without a second thought. That is something I would never do in
real life. I'd consider it leaving an «invitation» to a thief. But,
in the dream I thought nothing of it and entered the store part of
the service station to look for some eye protection with no concerns.
The
store was modern, well lit, and spacious. I found a display rack of
glasses near the register, but none of these seemed to suit my needs
(they were all strange neo-modern «sun glasses» though none of them
were tinted at all), so I looked around and found another display of
more expensive glasses which did have a pair that suited my needs but
were far too expensive (about $80).
It
was only then, as I was examining the expensive glasses that a
concern came into my mind about my bike. I thought I'd better not
leave it for too long, and then also realized that I'd stupidly left
my keys in the ignition. So I hurriedly left the store and, of
course, discovered my bike was gone.
But
the women i'd spoken to earlier were still there, so I asked them if
they had seen who took my bike. The one who suggested I look for
glasses int eh store said, «Yes, Mike Payton did.»
I
couldn't believe my ears! Not only did she see who took my bikew, but
she knew exactly who took it! I had to ask again, «Who?»
«Mike
Payton», she said, «I thought it was his bike. He just hit some guy
and then rode off on it.»
I
asked if she could spell his name, which she did (though the spelling
did not make any sense after I woke up and thought about it, it began
«PIA...») and then she lead me around to the other side of the
store where there was a pay phone so I could call the police.
And
that was when I did the second subtly uncharacteristic thing of
following a stranger into an unknown location and not even taking
stock of my surroundings. In other words, I let myself be led into a
trap, something I normally would not do in real life (I'm a very wary
person, and learned to always be aware of my surroundings while I was
in prison as a matter of survival). So, I never noticed the large
«biker» character (who was standing in the shadows but still in
plain sight). Actually, I did notice him, but just didn't consider
the significance of his presence until it was too late; and that's
what was so uncharacteristic of me («being aware of your
surroundings» precisely means considering the significance of
everything around you!)
I
innocently (or “ignorantly”) asked the girl if she'd tell the
police what she told me as I headed for the phone. But, before she
could even answer, the biker stepped out of the shadows and
confronted me. I said, “Who are you?” and he said, “Mike
Payton”, of course, and then proceeded to pound my face into the
ground.
That
was when I woke up and began pondering the dream. It wasn't until I
woke up though that I realized the whole thing was a set up, and I
ignorantly helped make it happen. I was as much a part of the robbery
as Mr. Payton and his girlfriend, precisely because of my
uncharacteristic ignorance. I should never have sent the “invitation”
and I should have been more aware (or “conscious”) of what was
going on. Then the “crime” wouldn't have happened. That is what
struck me about this dream. It seemed like a perfect example of how a
“victim” often ignorantly (a.k.a. “innocently”) participates
in the crime. So-called “criminals” instinctively look for this
“willingness” to participate. I've seen it happen over and over
in real life, and have literally “walked away” from many would-be
crimes that I “saw coming” a mile away. Perhaps you can credit my
experience in prison for this, but I prefer to think of it as the
mere absence of a victim mentality. And by, “victim mentality” I
don't mean the part before a crime happens; the part that invites,
and then facilitates the crime, exactly as I so uncharacteristically
did in this dream.
[J.D.
December 12, 2014]
P.S.
I would argue that the “System” promotes this “victim
mentality” in order to justify its “authority” to “protect”
us. In defense of this argument I'd offer the fact that any police
officer knows exactly what I'm talking about, and yet any effort made
to convey this understanding to do general public is quickly
suppressed and strongly discouraged for “political reasons”. The
consensus seems to be that people shouldn't have to protect
themselves; that's what the government is for. The effect, however,
is that people “innocently” let themselves be the victims of
crime all so the government can pretend to protect the after the
fact.
P.P.S.
In two separate movies I saw on the prison T.V. the day and day after
this dream the lead characters were named Payton. The first I had
never seen before (“Ride Along”); the second I had (“Pandorum”).
Coincidence?
